Dirty burgers and how they’re so wrong but, oh, so very right

Seriously, you gotta try a dirty burger.


It’s not often that I treat myself to a meal out, so when I made arrangements to meet up with my friend today I thought ‘Hell, why not? Let’s go for it!’. I put forward the notion of going to a new burger kitchen that’s opened up in Brighton’s East Street Tap┬ápub going by the name of ‘Burger Kult’. They proclaim to serve some of the best dirty burgers in town, and you know what? With all the conscious efforts to be fitter and healthier at the moment I deemed it about time to indulge in something sleazy like a dripping, oozing burger. Plus, I need my protein, right?

We arrived at the bar and were served by the lovely barmaid pronto (the perks of going midweek lunchtime). We both ordered the Chuck Satan (Remix) burger, evidently a best seller and with the list of mouthwatering filling such as maple bacon, Bourbon BBQ sauce, red onion and muscovado relish, St Giles cheese, fresh tomato and lettuce (yes, all in one burger) you can see why the punters might be tempted! We took our seats and waited with eager anticipation for the glory that was our lunch.

The devilish order was out pretty swiftly, and let me tell you the divine smell that hit my nostrils was enough to get me pretty darn excited for the flavours that were about to hit my taste buds. And with good reason. It. Was. Sublime. Hands down the best burger I’ve ever eaten. The burger was pink in the middle which really paid homage to the quality of the meat (ground chuck steak) making it beautifully succulent and moist. The bacon, BBQ sauce and relish were so juicy and sweet against the savoury of the beef, these elements swaddled the meat in a tender, oozing deliciousness. Then the cheese just brought the savoury back up again to match the sweetness, swamping everything with a gorgeous creamy Cheddar flavour. The salad was lovely and fresh, cutting through all the indulgent excitement with a hint of colour and crunch. Even the brioche bun was delicious – again, a little sweet but so soft and lightly buttery throughout.

Completing the experience was a side of fries served in coloured tumblers, which added a funky element to the presentation. And I have to say they were damn superb fries. Halfway between a fry and a chip (I’m not a skinny fries girl, so I was happy), they were perfectly formed and cooked, and well seasoned with the chef’s secret spice stash. (Perhaps a delicate paprika/chilli blend..?)

Unusually for me, I polished off the lot. Quite often I hardly have any bun and savour the chips, but care I did not! I was not elegant about this meal in the slightest and licked my fingers of every last morsel of BBQ sauce and chip seasoning before me. Dirty burgers are a thing for a reason. They’re good. They’re VERY good. In fact, they quite possibly are my new favourite thing and I’ll have to go back to Burger Kult to try the rest of the menu. Although I may have to limit myself to one every two weeks, because I’m pretty sure that a dirty burger is a big fat NO-NO on any personal trainer’s list. Any more often than that and it’s high cholesterol, here I come!

Honestly, I can’t recommend Burger Kult’s dirty burgers enough. So get yourself down to sunny (and windy) Brighton and order yourself some drool-inducing, juicy gorgeous meatiness – or the vegetarian ‘Holy Ray’, butter-griddled Halloumi cheese with tortilla chips, BBQ sauce piquillo peppers and lord knows what else, it sounds amazing. I hear tell that there’s also a vegan option in the making….. At Burger Kult, they will endeavour to make it devilishly delicious, whatever your foodie inclination. I know I’m hooked.

Booze rating: a few super-chilled pints of Pravha, or any of your favourite European pilsners to wash down that dirty, disgusting indulgence. Oh yeah.